That has been my dilemma for a while now. Not because I'm afraid. Because the words feel weary and worn out. Words escape me and I've found myself unable to form sentences about this.
So I decided after some thought, that I must take a stand, not for myself but for others and even if it has been said a thousand times.
There are certain scenarios that life throws at you from time to time, and it forces you to make a choice. Either to look away in ignorance or to face it dead on. With empathy, with kindness and open ears.
The past couple of weeks have been a roller coaster in terms of emotions and thoughts.
Just when I thought the worst was over, along came a few more incidents that made me question the direction that humanity is going toward.
The incidents in question are the horrific killings of Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd.
While I haven't constantly been posting about it on Instagram, I did feel like I had to take a stand. What better way to take a stand than with the 'pen', digital or not. The pen is mightier than the sword.
There are certain scenarios that life throws at you from time to time, and it forces you to make a choice. Either to look away in ignorance or to face it dead on. With empathy, with kindness and open eyes/ears.
Growing up in my culture as a South-East Asian, it was often implied that the deeper the skin colour, the worse off that person would be in life. That anything good they would ever acquire would be nothing short of a miracle.
An Iranian mother of a deeper skinned child with the cutest afro divulged this to me at a playground. She said, "My child's father, my husband, is black, so no one in the family generally talks about her looks, accepts her fully, or plays with her."
I have heard from white interviewers about a statuesque, highly educated African woman post her interview, that 'she would never be taken seriously by the X and Y (referencing nationalities), and the Z would laugh behind her back.'
I've been at a loss for words when this has happened. How is it so normal in this century, with our achievements in education, science, technology etc; that our mind still looks at the colour of skin as a deviation from the standard? And who has permission to define the standard anyway?
Oppression is the name
This is oppression in its most insidious and implicit form. The silent/implied unacceptance of someone who is technically your 'neighbour' simply because their outer bearings don't fit the standards that your family or generations have wired into you. Or because their success/excellence/virtues are somehow a threat to your ego.
We are human beings for a reason. We are naturally held to higher standards of activity than that of animals because of our cognizant and reasoning minds.
This kind of oppression starts within families and builds ugly nests inside people who eventually grow up to use their authority and responsibility to showcase anger and contempt. They're not taught to rein their emotions in. That there is a better way to communicate always. That respect is not just a requirement, it is a standard. I believe now more than ever, RESPECT is a crucial quality that needs to be ingrained into us and our kids. It does start by setting an example for our kids. It is hard when we haven't had it modelled for us and we don't know what it looks like practically. And we can do hard things.
History + Action = Legacy
History makers and change agents for good have had it the hardest and their legacies are the greatest. The generations before us have done what they could. Now it's up to each and every one of us that have thinking and cogitating brains to take responsibility for our actions. Truly, in order to change, it starts with pausing. It starts with listening to hear, to understand and take better decisions. Even more so, if we have been given the authority to protect, nurture and govern people.